Today I tried to think of my life without my companion and love Dave. I was reading this article in a magazine called "Table for Two" a list of weird courses that you could make for you and your mate. It had alot of awkward food that only left me with images of weird eating expressions and reaching for tums later. I tried to think of different people in Dave's place and it just left this sinking feeling. I'm not sure why I do this to myself or why I put the cat food in the refrigerator when I'm running out the door instead of the usual spot in the cupboard. It must be a natural reaction to challenge your comfort zone to "what if?". It was clear to me at this point that Dave and I have merged into one person in a way. Like Siamese twins I couldn't even think of how I could live without my other half that has been with me through so much.
When i was a little girl and having divorced parents it was hard for me to understand what love really was. I think its hard in general for anybody to really get it. I used to think it was ALOT about being intimate. Its weird when you grow up and you find that its so much more. I'm not bragging by this post, I hope all of you in the world find love in some way or another. Its just so much deeper and more simple then you could ever imagine. Kind of like walking on a trail deep in the woods to see on the other side there was a paved path that lead to your destination all along. You'll get it, eventually. I'm trying to tell you when you do it's really really nice. I'm very grateful for it, I thank the creator everday for being so lucky.
My new nephew has been through two open heart surgeries but he is getting better each day. He is almost two weeks old and while he isn't out of the woods yet, he is almost to the point where people can hold him. Can you imagine being a baby and not being able to be held for over two weeks? I'm excited his big day of cuddling is coming up :)
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